


Of Dreams and Nightmares and Everything in Between

by amdnj



Category: Kamen Rider Ghost
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-19
Updated: 2016-04-19
Packaged: 2018-06-03 06:48:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6600973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amdnj/pseuds/amdnj
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Takes place inbetween Episode 22 and 23</p><p>Implied Alan/Makoto , Alan/Takeru, and Alan/Makoto/Takeru</p><p>There are many things Alan simply does not understand about being human. So many things he did not understand before he had a body and even more that he supposes he only understands in passing to survive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Dreams and Nightmares and Everything in Between

There are many things Alan simply does not understand about being human. So many things he did not understand before he had a body and even more that he supposes he only understands in passing to survive.

There is nothing stranger to him than….sleep? Dreams? The state of being unconscious, vulnerable and helpless where your mind tortures you in incoherent ramblings of your day in a way that your pathetic state cannot simply tell that you are not awake.

Perhaps he is a bit biased on the matter.

The first night…or rather not even night. Under a bridge passed out for a short passage of time. His weak body sabotaging everything in a fit of insolence. And…

**_When you are in doubt…_ **

_A confusing suffocating feeling in his chest. Screams from his throat that do not escape his mouth. It’s dark. It’s so dark. Father’s voice is…everywhere? But it is dark. There is no light, but he can tell the sky is miserable red._

_…Miserable? But it’s always been._

_Twisted. And broken. Hesitation bubbles in his stomach. The sky is…._

_…..But Father why would he be in doubt if the world is perfect? If the world is perfect and logical and sensible. If no one dies and everything is wonderful. If he wants to protect the other world…..and make it like his then why…?_

_Why does the red sky fill him with such a miserable tangling feeling that drags his whole soul through his core to the lowest of his days?_

_Why should he know doubt? Perfection does not know doubt. Doubt is….imperfection. Why would he…?_

**_When you are in doubt, follow your heart._ **

_Heart? Heart? But that is…..illogical. Feelings are. Feelings are not needed. Father. They are not. Feelings are what humans…..that is why their world is dying. Feelings are…._

_But his father turns from him, shadowed by the confusion, and walks away. Getting farther and farther away….and every step he takes, running forward….Father is only…getting further?_

**_Alan!_ **

_And he stops. Because he feels…the air suddenly becoming lighter. The sky is…blue…a dark blue. His favorite shade of blue. And that voice is…._

_Specter._

_So he turns quickly to look at him, grinning as wide as he can. Because…everything will be-_

**_Let me show you the path I’ve chosen!_ **

_And the world shatters. Because that’s not? That’s not. No. His world is perfect. This is the wrong path. Specter! But he cannot speak. He has no words. Specter approaches him. The air is still light, but his stomach is heavy. The world is twisting. Colors have no names. Words have no sound. This isn’t. This is not._

_Nothing is…_

_Ah. Doubt. Is that what this is?_

_But then…his hands on his shoulders. His face is not…he is not._

_Specter is smiling._

_Beautiful. Just like the world he wants to protect….Another treasure. One of the most precious._

_And Specter is speaking but he doesn’t understand. But he is smiling. And he is warm. And safe…And his arms around him…and suddenly feelings clears if only for a moment._

_And the darkness is expelled? And there is…a path?_

_And suddenly Specter is...walking away. And the end of the path is so bright. A bright burning orange and red filled with passion and hope and….it’s overwhelming._

_Tenkuuji Takeru…?_

_And Makoto is next to him. The world is so bright around them. The path is….it’s there?_

_Tenkuuji Takeru’s smile is….a treasure as well isn’t it..?_

_And maybe….and maybe. Steps. He’s taking steps. Giving faith. Maybe._

**_What possible value could a living body hold for us?_ **

_And then path is destroyed. The world is dark. The sky is red. His essence is torn. Shattered. Scattered.  His brother’s hands in his heart. His heart? He isn’t supposed to? He isn’t supposed to?_

**_When you are in doubt, follow your heart._ **

_But doesn’t his father understand it’s his heart that is doubting? It’s his heart that is screaming? It’s his heart that his brother deems worthless? It’s his heart that is killing him…._

_His heart is_

A loud hoarse sound pierces the air, filled with a heavy and sharp feeling that permeates everything in his tears and desperation. Of broken understanding and halfhearted ideals. Of twisty-turns of confusion of a world he knew bathed in a color he never wants to see again

Ah. It’s his voice.

It’s his scream.

…Ah yes. He picks himself off the ground, wiping the tears. Staggering footsteps slowly erasing the images from his mind….erasing the feelings from his being.

Another frivolous human thing.


End file.
